WTF!!!

The Ish You Say Online: From MLK Ratchet Events, Nasty IG FoodPorn, to Subliminal Messages (WTF!)

We all do it… glance at our phones, our desktops, and laptops, and ask ourselves “Why is this person on my timeline?” I’m a victim to this all the time. Although all of my posts aren’t motivational and inspiring, I still try to keep all of my audience on social media in mind nowadays. However, every so often we get a whiff of some of the most straight up outlandish thoughts festering in the minds of the people around us. I don’t know if it’s drunk texting or just people trying to get a reaction, but so often I’m finding myself feeling compelled to click that unfollow button. It’s almost as if I’m enabling you when you post certain things, and I just keep browsing through. Now everything isn’t that bad, I haven’t seen a semi-naked pic since last year, which is great (claps hands), but lately I’m wondering… Did these folks think this through?

He Thinks He has Good “D”

Ladies, this is how this “gentleman” feels. Is it funny? On the other hand, is it just plain truth according to him? Are we really allowing people to use us like this, while we buy them sneakers and weed? Are you really going to let a man drive your car around off the strength that he may or may not provide you with good sex? I hope not! Nevertheless, he is being Retweeted and favorited by people who agree with this method of marketing. Let the world know, “I don’t have any specifically positive qualities about myself, except the fact that I know how to please you sexually, therefore I’m going to promote that to everyone on Twitter. I’m the man!” You can allow your man to embarrass you like this and look foolish for being THAT girl, but I can’t…

Nasty Spaghetti

When I get that delicious plate of food in front of me, I feel so compelled to share it with my friends. I’m about to eat a masterpiece of a meal, and I need you to see its beauty before I devour it. I’m not as committed to this Instagram ritual as everyone else, but that’s for a reason. Presentation is everything! You need to check your room before you take outfit pics and make sure it’s clean. You should always check for boogers before you snap selfies of your pretty face. Lord please help them. You should always ask yourself, if I saw this plate in a magazine would I be as hungry? You cannot snap pictures of your food, just because you made it. Don’t gross us out. So many points deducted for posting a pot full of penis on Instagram. That’s nasty. It looks seriously foul. It looks like it stinks. It appears as if you may have chopped off your fingers while chopping onions. Instead of going to the hospital, you just said, “So what! Let them eat my fingers”. Let’s focus on the task of cooking healthy, edible food, then after mastering that… you may snap your IG pics

MLK Ratchetness

In the spirit of Black History month, there will be many events to attend and people to see. It’s exciting, especially where I am. However, a little before February, a few promoters in a certain area decided to incorporate the late Dr. Martin Luther King (Martin Luther the King, in my house, lol) on a club flyer with two beautiful video vixens. OMG! I love a good party, of course one that had a purpose. However, creativity is at a stand still when you put one of my cultural leaders on a flyer sandwiched between big booty vixens. It’s false advertising. Will Dr. King be twerking it to Trinidad James at this party? Absolutely not, because he passed away. Have some respect!  I draw the line at my attendance on that one. MLK would not have made it rain on these young women… out in a public venue. Just stop!

F*** VA

I keep telling folks, stop disrespecting your home. If you’re not going places in your career, there is reason other than you pointing the finger to everyone else. Are you branching outside of your circle? Are you out there networking and handling business, or do you expect everyone to come to you because you’re the loudest person on our TL after 8pm? I can’t stand how local people say their trying to give the whole city some shine, when your light is barely flickering for yourself. It’s arrogant and lacks professionalism. Go somewhere else and get love, but if that’s how you really feel. However, don’t expect too many people to continue to support that disloyal attitude. I may not get all the love I WANT where I am, but the love I do receive, I appreciate it. Sometimes, you should keep those negative self-sabotaging remarks to yourself. Don’t be discouraging, display how you’re building from the struggle.

Subliminal Tweegrams

This is so funny! You’re mad about some messages you’re seeing that you may believe pertain to you. Therefore, you pull up your tweegram application, you type a message of your own, pick a nice background, and you send. This message is so powerful and so thought provoking that you can’t wait to share it on Instagram, which will ultimately be shared on your Twitter and Facebook. Except you forgot one thing, not only are you contradicting yourself… but you’re doing the same thing that you’re complaining about in your message. We spend too much time trying to get people back. I know, because I got a few songs written about me by some local rappers with no relevance. However, if this person would have just picked up the phone, sent a direct message, or ignored the situation, eventually she would have gotten her answers. I say leave it in 2012; because our haters and non-supporters aren’t worth that much energy, considering we’re too busy giving them a reason to hate us. Let’s get to work, stop the subliminal bullcrap!

Victory

I want to see more of this. I want to see more people uplifting other people with their words, their minds, and their hearts. I want to get motivation from my timeline, a good laugh, and one of those inspiring jolts, which come from a positive place. I think if you’re learning something free, then you should share that with people. Allow them to get on your level, instead of stooping down to theirs. Retweet positive things, funny jokes, and remember anyone can see you. We’re not perfect but aim for your own version of perfection and put your best foot forward. I love seeing messages like these on a constant basis. Let’s free our minds with love and light from here on out.

For more of the Baddest Creative Motivation, Follow me on Twitter @GaptoothDiva

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WTF! 8 Unspoken Ghetto Ratchet Trends among Some Black Women… Especially In the Hood

I get in my car and drive all around the city, seeing some of the craziest and bizarre things you can imagine. Sometimes I’m in the Southside or Northside of Richmond, and other times I’m in either the Fan/Downtown or the Westend. Either way I turn, there is always these offenders of fashion and straight up common sense, that either need someone to look up to or a swift ass kicking. Often times I don’t even have to go far from my laptop, to feel disgraced. There are people flooding my timeline with their cavalier trashiness, so it’s enough to log off completely. What is going on with the world? Have we given up on common decency and self-respect? Has the age of YOLO (You Only Live Once) really instilled “F*ck everything and kill yourself and your image” into the minds of various generations? I mean… damn! I don’t even talk to my neighbors, I’m ashamed to spend money on my side of town because I’m afraid I’m contributing to the bullshit, and I can’t wipe the “stank face” off as my facial expression until I cross some type of bridge. It’s ratchet… no other description necessary. If you’re having a hard time understanding what I’m referring to, look below. If you or anyone you know, fits into any of these descriptions… I’m sorry…. I’m talking about you.

1. Pajamas and Hair Scarves Everywhere

I’ve been complaining about this since my days as a Social Worker for Social Services. There are clans of people coming into business establishments wearing their nighttime sleepwear. WTF! Why couldn’t you have rolled out of bed, took a shower (washed your face & brushed your teeth), then thrown on a pair of sweats/yoga pants/jeans and a t-shirt vs. coming out with your dingy pajamas and slippers on? Why is it so hard to get out of your pajamas? Especially when it’s after noon and you still haven’t gotten the intentional fortitude to get dressed. That’s just lazy. Some chicks (that’s my way of not calling you out your name) come out with an $80 hairweave all wrapped up in dirty hair scarves, pajamas and slippers on, and seriously having the audacity to expect some form of respect when they go out to handle their “business” during the day… why? You obviously didn’t respect yourself enough to get dressed for your (busy) day, nor did you apply any effort in how you were perceived walking out the door.

I encourage any woman in her right mind to take these individuals to the side and instill some knowledge into them. If you have been mobile with these offenders, you are as much responsible as they are. Say, “Girl! Get Dressed, I’ll Wait.” Then don’t leave the parking lot or front yard until they do. By not tolerating this from friends and family, maybe we can one day abolish this nonsense.

2. Are You Busting Out Your Clothes? Can You Even Breathe?

As a plus size woman myself, I’m quite familiar with the slight envy a person may have about certain fashion trends that you want to take part in but can’t. I know first hand how hard it is, to see something you love, but knowing deep inside they don’t make it in your size. That fact alone, does not give us thick and voluptuous human beings the right to squeeze into anything that is not physically made to withstand our God-given curves. You look thirsty. You look stupid. You look desperate for some attention. Modern technology has afforded us a wealth of options that can slenderize our appearance within moderation (i.e., Spanx, girdles, and damn exercise regiment perhaps). However, stuffing our flesh into clothes too small, and letting whatever hangs out… just hang out, makes everyone nauseous and afraid of yeast infection around you. The world doesn’t hate big girls, as many would believe. The world just hates big girls who don’t embrace the fact that they are big, too caught up in thinking they can measure up to a few video vixens and not staying in their lane. Being half-naked doesn’t make your fat more appealing, it just makes it more visible. Stop it! Save the nakedness for a self-appreciation photo shoot or a nude beach, and keep it out the nightclubs and off the bus stops, thank you.

3. Weaves, Wigs & Lacefronts… Some of You Don’t Know What They Hell You’re Doing

I used to love a good weave and a decent lacefront, believe me when I tell you. I would go out of my way and shop online all day for the perfect hairpiece to free me from having to play in my natural hair every single day. I admit I was being lazy and I wasn’t completely committed to the idea of wearing my natural hair, so far be it from me to judge anyone else. However, there is an epidemic of ratchetness among us, no one is addressing. Women and young girls everywhere choosing to put cheap plastic strands in their hair, wearing ill-fitted wigs and lacefronts in the summer time, and not properly having them applied, it’s all so obvious. Hair professionals everywhere should be pulling these potential clients to the side and recommending some appropriate alternatives to help a sister look good.

I advocate for natural hair now, choosing to wear my TWA (teeny weenie afro) versus subjecting myself to another wig or lacefront, but that’s just me. When I see young girls wearing them, and wearing them wrong, I feel obligated to let them know how dumb they look. You cannot pull it into a ponytail without it being secure on the edges. If it’s nappy on the ends, people do notice. Why anyone would sell you a wig or lacefront is beyond me, but that’s a customer service issue. I just ask that we set a good example for each other. When you have a friend wearing her hairpiece in a way that doesn’t compliment her, why not inform and educate her? Why let the chick walk around looking crazy? If a man notices that your hair game is off, do you really believe that your friends didn’t think so as well? It’s just a matter of wearing what compliments you and not what you think is trendy or hot right now. Believe me lacefronts are no longer trendy. Death to lacefronts!

4. Smoked Out In Front Of The Kids

I sat in the parking lot of the barbershop waiting for my husband to come out. I smelled a familiar aroma coming from the car next to me. I looked to my left and noticed two women in a Buick smoking on what smelled and appeared to be some “sticky icky” (LOL), I just wanted to say that. They were smoking marijuana. Nothing new around these parts, I guess, except in the back seat was a little baby girl unbuckled standing up playing. I was so upset at the site of this that I immediately got out of the car and walked away, not wanting to be in the vicinity any longer. Of course, I took to Twitter and Facebook with my rant, hoping that someone could shed light on this ratchetness. Many people agreed that it was foolish ghetto behavior and the culprits should have been jailed. They even drove off as we were leaving, parallel to our car just driving and puffing away like everything was cool and we lived in Amsterdam. Trash! Outside I was fuming and praying they got home safely with the child, but inside I rather wanted those chicks locked up and taught a lesson.

Why smoke in front of your kids? Why pull out whatever it is that eases your nerves and light up in front of the seeds you raised and brought into this world? We wonder why kids act up and behave badly, never thinking that some of their behavior is a reflection of what they see from us. People that smoke in front of their kids should be shot… period. You’re in the car (close proximity) and you don’t once think that maybe this is getting into my child? God forbid anyone gives your child a cigarette or bag of weed; you would go off and want them killed. Nevertheless, you spark your ish in their face and want someone to give you flowers on mothers/fathers day, get the f*ck out of town! I don’t get it, and probably never will. However, believe me when I say, you can’t care about their health if you do some mess like that, you just can’t.

5. My Name Isn’t Bitch and You Are Not My Friend

I have a problem with cursing, like anyone with passion and the balls to say what they feel. I have to catch myself often, especially when I’m around certain people, because unlike some… I think about the feelings of others. Nowadays, I wouldn’t want anyone to be uncomfortable because of my language (I never used to give a… well you know), so I use my education and extensive vocabulary to convey my feelings like modern ordinary individuals. However, you have those bad apples that can’t help but to say some of the dirtiest words anywhere they please, even in public places, places of business, or sometimes in front of their children. No judgment, it’s just an observation.

What makes me mad is the females that claim to be your friend and love you, but call you “Bitch” in every other sentence. What is your problem? Are you mad? How would I know if you’re mad at me, if you call me “Bitch” all the time? It’s just too much. “Bitch, you crazy”“, “You’re a stupid Bitch!”, “I’m a real Bitch!”, and the funniest “They better show this Bitch some respect!” WTF! Are you serious?

I can’t roll with you if that’s how you conduct yourself. You sound drunk. I think it’s perfectly fine, to correct someone (especially a new friend) and let them know that you will not tolerate that nonsense. An off-color joke every now and then is not a problem, but if you answer your phone right before church with a “What’s up Bitch!” I’m ending the friendship.

6. Is The Nightclub More Important Than Everything Is?

We talk about current events and you’re not interested. We discuss the fate of the city and try to get residence together for a cause or higher purpose, but you decline and sleep half the day away. We offer family friendly events for you to enjoy, but if there is no liquor, you’re not coming out. What is wrong with people? The Club has taken all your interest. I see events that say about 50 people will attend when it’s about a charity or cause, its non-hip hop related, or is more subtle and professional. However “Twerk Something Tuesdays” and “Bootie Shorts and Stiletto Saturdays” has 90% of my followers in attendance.

Chicks rather get half-naked and drunk than to sit through a poetry reading, a book signing, a play or showcase, or a networking event. They will leave their kids at home by themselves, to follow the latest “baller” somewhere and use their government assistance checks to buy everything they need to get there. It’s craziness. You sitting at home all Saturday in your pajamas, leave out late afternoon to shop at Rainbow to find an outfit, just to be wasted in the club with your beer belly out. Stop It!

There are other options in nightlife than the nightclub. If you really looking for a man, that should be the last place you look… dummy. You want substance, than you have to go where substance is. Any man trying to get at you in the club is hoping you are too drunk to realize that he just wants to get in those drawers (or lack there of, since some of you don’t wear any). Stop allowing the club to be the go-to destination every single weekend. That lifestyle will only dry you out and make you old quicker. I know some of you think that being young means you are supposed to be there all the time, but that is not true. Save yourself, your wallet and your dignity and find more quality things to do with the girls.

7. What Are You Reading On?

Gossip Magazines and Blogs, Hood Stories and Literature, Fashion and Hair Magazines… you name it, we all have our preferences. Nevertheless, a good advice column, self-help or self-improvement book, an article about family, health, current events, relationships, cooking, hobbies, etc. could all be great additions to your reading list as well. Rather than tuning in immediately at 8pm for the latest episode of “Housewives and Ex-Girlfriends” why not catch that later and read about new ways to introduce romance into your relationship, or better alternatives to talking to your children about sex and drugs, or maybe even how to start a business.

It’s important to me as an individual, that I not always get my information funneled to me through my timeline and the grapevine, but through my own research. It’s too many females who do not know how to read an application and complete it, but they can talk about everything on reality television. We have to do better. Education doesn’t always have to be paid for and given to you through the form of a degree these days. There are plenty of capable, intelligent people, who are self-taught through their own efforts. Nowadays, there is no excuse for not knowing about yourself and the world around you.

It’s a shame more of us aren’t taking it upon ourselves to forgo the latest gossip book and show, and reading about our passions and future ambitions. We would be a lot further.

8. I Don’t Like Her… But Guess What She Said On Facebook!

This final one always intrigued me. It seems every hood chick in the world uses social media to follow her enemies, stalk them, and then report on their online behavior. They spend all day sending cryptic messages about how that particular person “Really doesn’t want none” and “people better start saying what’s on their minds”, but you never know to whom she is referring to. From song lyrics out of nowhere, to apparent arguments with their baby daddy’s, it seems like our timelines are filled with misspelled rants of a ghetto “These Are Our Lives”.

Explain to me how someone can go from gospel videos and bible quotes Monday Thru Thursday, but then on Friday pictures of liquor and rants about “he ain’t hitting it right”. I mean… c’mon! Where do they do that? Social media is about sharing information and connecting with people, not just posting your baby to get likes, and then everything else is pictures of you in a seedy ass nightclub with a bodycon dress on. If you don’t like someone then unfollow them, stop following people just to know what’s going in their lives. It’s pathetic. How can you in your right mind feel comfortable talking about people that you choose to connect to online, you look foolish. When someone says they don’t like someone or can’t stand someone, nowadays to check the validity of what their saying, I check to see with whom they are friends with online. Most of the time they are connected to that individual online. They are just waiting and watching for their next move. If you stop dealing with me and don’t like me, I employ you to please stop following me… it’s only going to make you mad.

I know that if you’re reading this, you’re probably not the offenders that I’m referring to (if you are than you should be quite inspired to change). However, I think that by being motivators, inspirers, and pillars in our community, we have a moral obligation to touch as many lives as we can… as much as we can. If you know someone like this, give him or her a helpful word of encouragement or a smack in the back of the head, whatever works. Let’s just make a difference… one ratchet ass person at a time.

Follow me on Twitter @GaptoothDiva https://www.twitter.com/GaptoothDiva

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• Definition: Lacefront Wig (bellasugar.com)
• Can We Please Stop Using The Term “Ghetto”? (beautyfulones.wordpress.com)
• Your ‘Role Models’ Didn’t Even Catch The Shade Vibe Magazine Served Them. That’s The Great Part. (crunktastical.net)
• More Than XY: A Visual to Black Fathers and Positive Male Role Models (kamranassadi.wordpress.com)
• Giving Children of Color Role Models (spanglishink.wordpress.com)
• 5 Year Olds Hate Their Natural Black Hair! (revealyourcrown.com)
• Seven Tips To Help Your Fashionista Save Money (thefashionablebambino.com)
• Anti-Bullying Is Not Just For Kids (mommadjane.com)
• Cyber-stalking, Harassment, slander and threats (awkward-reality.com)
• How To Identify & Fend Off Twitter Stalkers (makeuseof.com)
• Operation Liberation: Tearing Down The Pink Ghetto (women2.com)
• Ratchet (dizzyisms.wordpress.com)

Osama Bin Laden Is Dead

The Infamous al Qaeda Terrorist Osama Bin Laden Has Been Killed. The World Celebrates!  youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aC9idzWMR5U

GaptoothDiva Weekend Wrap Up – What’s New and Interesting?

VCU RAMS Defeated Against Butler – But I’m Still A Fan!

Yes, VCU Rams lost, but our faith and dedication to supporting one another should not fall by the waist side. If you believe that Richmond and Virginia as a whole deserves just as much National attention as all these other localities, then tell your out of state friends and family to look us up, to check us out, and to continue to see that Virginia has talent, integrity, and awesome people right here. Congratulations to the VCU Rams for getting that far. Next year, we’ll know where we went wrong and we will rectify it all the way, so look out and beware. Virginia is coming our stronger and more fierce!

Troy Mass – None Of Dat (Prod. By Kajmir Royale)        

Tear gas-like substance used on Broad Street after VCU game | Richmond Times-Dispatch

Tear gas-like substance used on Broad Street after VCU game | Richmond Times-Dispatch.

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• Final Four Video: Watch VCU Fans Have a Riot After Rams Fall to Butler in Final (bleacherreport.com)
• Student media leaders help cover VCU Final Four (vcustudentmedia.wordpress.com)
• Getting published somehwere (amandaloviza.wordpress.com)
• Shaka Smart has deal to remain at Virginia Commonwealth (sports.espn.go.com)
• Richmond is full of assholes. But Rams! Hooray for the final four!! (unrulylife.wordpress.com)
• Shaka Smart has deal to remain at Virginia Commonwealth (sports.espn.go.com)
• Walter King, grandfather of VCU coach Shaka Smart, dies at 90 years old (sports.espn.go.com)
• Final Four: Despite loss, VCU fans take to streets to celebrate team (sports.espn.go.com)
• VCU fans cheer, get rowdy as season ends (seattletimes.nwsource.com)

GaptoothDiva Emergency Update!!!!

Tonight’s Guest Canceled On Some Deep Stuff!! TUNE IN @ 9pm. I’m not holding back at all this is crazy. We have not progressed, have we?

www.blogtalkradio.com/GaptoothDivaRadio

The Importance of Vital Sex

GaptoothDiva Classified Ad

Respectable, Clean, Drug and Disease Free Couple seeks New Wife

Candidate must be between the ages of 27 and 45, clean, drug and disease free, a weekend alcoholic, and appreciate spontaneity (because we are likely to be off the chain at the drop of the hat), must be thick-skinned and quick witted, some college is preferred but not required…it wouldn’t matter (just know how to read, write, and count money)

Must be able to clean, cook, baby-sit, sew, paint, move furniture, type up to 40 wpm, take photos, and wait on us hand and foot for the rest of your life.

This is not a job and you cannot quit, unless you die

This marriage will not be consummated, so if you have needs you are free to seek them elsewhere (On your days off, which are only Sunday and holidays) Just don’t let us hear you!

Knowledge of social networking is required, the wife needs someone to update her Facebook status and manage her tweets every two hours.

Candidate must provide their own bed; there will be no sleeping with us. We are too big and don’t like to share the covers.

We have no interest in meeting your in-laws or family (due to the fact that they might not approve of your new relationship) but it would be helpful to see what you will look like in ten/twenty years.

Must not have guest invited to the home between the hours of 8am and 6am.

Candidate must be free of backtalk, head-rolling, finger-snapping and gum-popping attitude because the wife doesn’t play that.

Must be able to deal with road-rage, moody mornings, and occasional bouts of post dramatic syndrome

Must be able to deal with the fact that you won’t be able to watch what you want on television, unless there is no one home with you, you won’t be able to get on the computer unless no one is home, and you probably won’t ever have an opportunity to comfortably use the restroom without someone banging on the door.

Must provide your own feminine hygiene products

We cannot promise health benefits due to the state of the economy, but we do have plenty of band-aids and cotton balls, we will try to make you as comfortable as possible until it interferes with our own state of comfort. There will be no signs of affection, but we may giggle/chuckle at an occasional joke if you tell it right.

Applicants should reply by email with picture, because although we won’t sleep with you, we try to keep sexy people around us because they attract other sexy people.

Thank you for your interest & good luck on your interview

The Freakin’ Rainbow

Creepy Sports Paraphernalia

I was a little freaked out by the fake children things that someone has been making to commemorate the sports teams. I don’t know who came up with the idea, but to see something like this in the hall or next to my desk reminded me of the days of Chuckie. I would never purchase one… really don’t see the purpose in them, but they seem like a cute gift for that sports lover in your life. Check them out… but I don’t know what their called. Maybe you should Google freaky, creepy, child like voodoo dolls with sports paraphernalia on or something.

IDon’tGiveASh*T Award Goes to….

GAPTOOTHDIVA REALTALK – WTF… Size Does Matter

*Actual emails or text messages sent to me from people I know, names have been omitted to protect the innocent from getting their a@*es kicked or being humiliated.

GaptoothDiva,

How do I know if my _________ is small?

What is a nice size _________________ to you?

Tryin 2 B On

Dear Tryin 2 B On,

I normally don’t answer these texts but I will humor you, besides I just had a shot of Patron, let’s see what happens.

Answer #1…       You only need a drop of lotion to handle your business.

                                People laugh at it

                                Women say, “Aaaawww”, likes it’s a baby or a puppy

                                And when you get kicked in the ___________… it doesn’t hurt at all!

Answer #2          Whatever size my man has….duh!!!

                                Not too small, not too big, just right

                                None of your damn business!!!!

Now tuck your ________ back in and go to sleep!!!

85 Year Marriage

Meet Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher of North Carolina . They have been married 85 years (86 in May) and hold the Guinness World Record for the longest marriage of a living couple and get this…. Zelmyra is 101 years old and Herbert is 104.

The happily married couple teamed up with twitter this Valentine’s Day to answer some relationship questions. Check out their take on finding love, getting through hard times and more. Good read.

1. What made you realize that you could spend the rest of your lives together? Were you scared at all?
H & Z: With each day that passed, our relationship was more solid and secure.Divorce was NEVER an option – or even a thought.

2. How did you know your spouse was the right one for you?
We grew up together & were best friends before we married. A friend is for life – our marriage has lasted a lifetime

3. Is there anything you would do differently after more than 80 years of marriage?
We wouldn’t change a thing. There’s no secret to our marriage, we just did what was needed for each other & our family.

4. What is your advice to someone who is trying to keep the faith that Mr. Right is really out there?
Zelmyra: Mine was just around the corner! He is never too far away, so keep the faith – when you meet him, you’ll know.

5. What was the best piece of marriage advice you ever received?
Respect, support & communicate with each other.Be faithful, honest & true.Love each other with ALL of your heart

6. What are the most important attributes of a good spouse?
Zelmyra: A hard worker & good provider.The 1920s were hard,but Herbert wanted & provided the best for us.I married a good man!

7. What is your best Valentine’s Day memory?
Zelmyra: I cook dinner EVERY day.Herbert left work early & surprised me – he cooked dinner for me! He is a VERY good cook!

Herbert: I said that I was going to cook dinner for her & she could relax – the look on her face & clean plate made my day!

8. You got married very young – how did u both manage to grow as individuals yet not grow apart as a couple?
“Everyone who plants a seed & harvests the crop celebrates together” We are individuals, but accomplish more together.

9. What is your fondest memory of your 85-year marriage?
Our legacy: 5 children, 10 grandchildren, 9 great-grandchildren, and 1 great-great grandchild.

10. Does communicating get easier with time? How do you keep your patience?
The children are grown, so we talk more now. We can enjoy our time on the porch or our rocking chairs – together.

11. How did you cope when you had to be physically separated for long periods of time?
Herbert: We were apart for 2 months when Z was hospitalized with our 5th child. It was the most difficult time of my life. Zelmyra’s mother helped me with the house and the other children, otherwise I would have lost my mind.

12. At the end of bad relationship day, what is the most important thing to remind yourselves?
Remember marriage is not a contest – never keep a score. God has put the two of you together on the same team to win

13. Is fighting important?
NEVER physically! Agree that it’s okay to disagree, & fight for what really matters. Learn to bend – not break!

14. What’s the one thing you have in common that transcends everything else?
We are both Christians & believe in God.Marriage is a commitment to the Lord.We pray with & for each other every day.

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They also closed out the Q&A with one last message: We wish we could answer more questions! Thanks for your support and interest in our story – we are overwhelmed. And we wish you a happy Valentine’s Day – may it be filled with love and joy. God bless you all, Herbert and Zelmyra.

Momma… You Should Be Ashamed!!!

These Pics were emailed to me from one of those hot ghetto mess websites…

I am so saddened by this. These are two pretty little girls who seem as if they could have the world, but someone convinced them that this was entertaining and cute. It’s one thing to do this as an adult, but to teach a little girl this behavior is just plain wrong.

Pray for ‘em and let’s try to keep ‘em off the pole.