We Are The Beginning and End for Our Children, So Why Aren’t More Parents Taking Their Job Seriously?

As the product of a dysfunctional upbringing, it was always important for me (as a parent now) to ensure that my children don’t ever look back and wonder why I wasn’t a better mom. Work, school, bills, relationships, events, activities, and life as a whole will pull on us everyday, whether we like it or not. However, the blessing and opportunity to love our children, not with things, but with our hearts and souls… only comes to a very few. So why aren’t we taking greater advantage of it?

Lately, I’ve been reminded that many parents are depending on the school system and its administration to steer their children in the right direction. They are probably never considering that school systems deal with politics and bureaucracy, that some teachers may be there for only a check, and that your child is in a classroom with over 15 children at a time. No one at school can dedicate that much time to your kid in such a short period, with several other children from various backgrounds pulling on them constantly.

Therefore, some other parents are depending on the childcare/daycare to help ease some of the stress. However, let me explain that most of these businesses are only required to keep your child physically safe, away from harm and danger, and well fed and healthy until you return from work. They are not required to ensure that your child can read, write, or even speak proper English. They are not required to ensure that child has an adequate amount of self-esteem, knows right from wrong, or that the teacher in the classroom doesn’t have emotional problems of their own. It’s about money most of the time, if they enroll your child then its income for the business.

So, what do parents have left? Ourselves! It is our responsibility to ensure that our children know the basics from saying “please” and “thank you” to more complicated topics like “stranger-danger”, child abuse, discipline, and something as important as washing their filthy hands after using the bathroom. Our relationships will come and go, our jobs, although important are essential because we have children to care for. Therefore, to ignore the very seeds we put on earth, to get that paper and keep up with the “Joneses” makes absolutely no sense to me.

Last week, I had the displeasure of witnessing two very troubled children cause chaos all over a daycare center just because they could. Of course, the mother was dealing with so much on her plate, with her new employment and being a single mother, she had her hands full. My heart was heavy for her because if she could get the help she needed, without worrying about being paid, bills, or other life struggles, she could very well turn these kids around.  However, despite the children’s bad behavior and her struggles, the kids managed to have brand new sneakers, video games, and even quoted lines from recent movies in theaters right now. I knew then, it wasn’t about the struggles anymore, it was about parents not having their priorities straight. It’s about people assuming positions of change, yet allowing the dollar to become priority over their purpose. Everyone gave up on these kids, so the kids gave up on themselves. I literally sat there and saw a child inflicting injuries on herself, crying her soul out for attention (needing someone to intervene), while one of the staff members videotaped her tantrum supposedly for legal purposes. This girl was irrational and her parent was at work, this was kind of situation that required a hospital and psychological professionals. It hurt so bad to witness this, more so because in my position there was nothing I could do. As a mother, I wanted to scoop her up and figure out what was wrong, set her straight and comfort her all at the same time. It was then that I knew, we as parents depend on the system too much to raise our children. The system is only depending on your fee.

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I spend a lot of time with my children. I teach them right from wrong and I have the tough conversations with them early. I have a lot on my plate and I am by no means a perfect parent. I do as much as I can, because I don’t want to depend on school and daycare to parent my child, it’s my responsibility. My son will learn a lot on the streets and from other kids, but it’s my duty to ensure that he knows the facts. His behavior and his actions are a reflection on my abilities to be an adequate parent, and myself. I’m accountable for my actions, as any healthy adult should be. I can’t blame school and daycare for what I failed to do at home. So relationships, business, and other stuff to the side, if your children are acting up, think about what you did to contribute to that behavior. Is it the movies and television you allow them to watch that has them acting like fools? Are they seeing your adult behavior when they shouldn’t be? Are they privy to your idle gossip and grown-up conversations when you think they aren’t paying attention?

We can’t complain about the world and all of the messiness, when we unknowingly contribute to it. Not steering our younger generations in the right direction is the first strike against making any positive headway at all. Chasing money and trying to make sure your family looks “fly” only covers the surface. The kids that are neglected the most always seem to have the priciest labels and latest gadgets, has anyone else noticed that? Our focus should be their physical, mental, and spiritual health as well as looking good. That also includes our own health as well. If we are at our best, then our children are at theirs. It’s our job to be awesome parents, let’s make sure we do it to the best of our abilities regardless of our circumstances.

Love and awesomeness,

I’esha GaptoothDiva

Follow me on Twitter @GaptoothDiva

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Motherhood Shaming: Are They Jealous or Justified?

I’ve wanted to talk about this subject for a while. Ever since I announced my pregnancy last November, the idea that I should be ashamed of having children was heavy on my mind. It appeared that many of my so-called friends were dropping off the social calendar at rapid speeds, and I couldn’t figure it out. It wasn’t until a former friend of mine decided to be completely honest and admit that people with no children are much more fun than people who have kids. I found this statement to be a little more than ridiculous, considering that the person who said this… had children herself! Was I hearing this correctly? Were young mothers being made to feel ashamed of having a family of their own? Another former friend of mine was pretending (online) that she didn’t have kids, when in fact she has a daughter that is about 8 years old. While she’s tweeting about getting drunk and smoking, having sex with other people’s husbands, and going to the club every weekend, her daughter sits in her room and watches cartoons. When I asked her about her role as a mother and how it plays into her life online, she stated, “Nobody wants to hear about my kids, girl. That’s not hot!” To imagine pretending that I don’t have these two fantastic little boys, for the attention I get online, send me into a raging fit. Why can’t my children and my family be apart of the equation?

I have a very small amount of friends that are doing something closely related to the entertainment industry, and have children. Most of the people that I meet are single and have no children. Some even stating that they don’t plan to have any kids, because they fear it will negatively affect their careers. Those that are in the industry and have children, most likely had those children mid-career or after they’ve established themselves in their niche. This doesn’t mean that it’s impossible to have both; it just means that it will take much effort and dedication on your part. In the beginning of my pregnancy, I was made to feel like I was in the way. People approached with sorrow, instead of joy initially because I would no longer be able to “party” with everyone. No more late nights drinking and dancing, no more clubs and chaos until after the baby was born. It seemed as if all the talk about babies and family life, made me older than my years while everyone was screaming “YOLO” to the top of their lungs.

Now that I’m not pregnant anymore, and able to say I have my body back, things have changed a little. Those old friends want to hook up for drinks and dancing again, but my priorities are different now. I’m more interested in spending time with people that appreciate that I am a family woman. I can’t go hang out at the clubs as if I’m single and childless, because that’s not my reality. I’m married and I have two sons, and I don’t mind if my life reflects that. When a former friend of mine told me that seeing so much about my family, reminded her of what she didn’t have and it was annoying, it hurt. I don’t throw my blessings in people’s faces with the intention of them being jealous or annoyed; I just want to show how proud I am of my beautiful family. Therefore, when I am not invited to Girl’s Night Out, by people like that, I already know the reasons. I just appreciate their honesty and chalk them up as old friends. If I can’t post pics of my kids and my husband, for fear of annoying some envious friends, then they are not really my friends.

People have to understand that we all are at different places in our lives. Some of us have made decisions that may have changed the dynamic of how we live our lives. I’ve made some bad decisions in the past, but having children and getting married was not one of them. Motherhood is hard, its work, and it’s not always glamorous and sexy. Nevertheless, having kids didn’t take away my personality or make me dull; it just made me more responsible. Therefore, if getting wasted at the club and going home with strange people is your idea of fun, I probably would be boring to you.

One girl came to me recently and admitted to me that she chose to “pay me no mind” when I first started to promote GaptoothDiva and the website. She said that she didn’t think it was going to go anywhere because I wasn’t as provocative and wild as other people were. She admitted that it wasn’t until she got pregnant and I started to talk about my family more, that she felt that she could relate to me. Prior to her pregnancy (back when all I did was promote local artist), her priorities were very different. All she wanted to do was tweet, drink, smoke, and have sex. She said that when she got pregnant, she wanted to learn more about having a family and still work towards your dreams. I felt honored that she included me in a list of people that now have her attention, especially since her mind-set is in a more positive place. When people tell me that I’m not their cup of tea anymore, because of my family situation and motherhood, I realize now that they aren’t the audience I want.

Motherhood is nothing to be ashamed of, no matter what age you are. You will have to change your focus to include your children, so partying and people shouldn’t be your main precedence, but that’s not a negative thing. People will assume that your lifestyle is an obstacle to be overcame, or they may not understand the obstacles you do face because you have children, either way it is not your responsibility to explain that to them. If someone can’t respect the fact that you have children, then they probably aren’t people you should deal with. It all in what you make it. If you want motherhood to be glamorous and sexy, then make it that way. If you want it to be exciting and fun, then plan so that it can be. I never looked at single people with no children and seriously considered them luckier than I was. Yes, I’ve joked about having kids and not having a sitter sometimes; but to deny my children to anyone whether we’re online or IRL is absolutely a no-no!

How someone could shame you into denying your children, I don’t get it. I know that some people aren’t ready get married and have a kid, that’s their personal choice. However, to ever try to make some feel small for making that decision, is just plain wrong. Blame it on jealousy, and the envy of secretly wanting a family and that level of love themselves. However, I would never say that behavior like this is ever justified. If the limitations they propose are really limitations that you face, you should find alternative solutions to them yourself. Don’t live with the notion that you can’t pursue your dreams and accomplish your goals, because you have children. We weren’t given anything more than what we can handle, so don’t make excuses. Love your children and do the best you can, keeping up with other people (with or without children) isn’t the purpose of your life. Obviously, if you’re a mother, you already know what your purpose is… live it, with no apologies. Never allow someone to shame you into denying your motherhood. You’ve earned it.

Has Anyone Ever Tried Motherhood Shaming on You?

Follow me on Twitter/Instagram: @GaptoothDiva

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GaptoothDiva Life: What to Expect When You’re Expecting, Motherhood, and Mayhem

We are coming upon the last days of this pregnancy. I must admit that I’m not at all excited about anything other than getting the baby out of my uterus. It’s been a long drawn out road of ups and downs, sickness and health, and most times, it seemed like death do us part. I never imagined being this sick, especially since my first pregnancy went by without a hitch, however this time around I was in for a fight. I had a fight internal as well as one with my own mind. I had to learn to fight the urge to want to please everyone around me, promising myself to make ME a priority over the success of anything else. I could have easily fell victim to overextending myself for false friends and networking colleagues, but the truth is my unborn child, my family, and my health came first. I couldn’t sacrifice my well-being for the sake of being liked, even if that meant redeveloping my brand after everything was said and done.

I especially think it was hard, because I never tried to operate my own business with the task of being pregnant. Therefore, with all the events and invitations I received, I never really had to discern which events were more appropriate for me to attend so thoroughly. In the past going to a party in some nightclub, affectionately themed after some grown and sexy cliché’, wouldn’t have sounded like a bad idea. However, after being pregnant I realized that some things are best left to the childless and unmarried crowd. I couldn’t imagine getting down at the “shortest shorts” event or hanging out at the “mid-week ménage” with no other purpose than to raise funds for some local charity. It’s just not about my image anymore, a fact pregnancy drilled into my mind quickly. I want to set an example and show people there is more to life than getting wasted and partying. I know some people mentioned “I’m foul” cause I don’t cover their events anymore or attend and “support” them. As ridiculous as that is, I initially thought they could possibly be right. After much prayer and deliberation, I had to accept that those who mattered didn’t mind, and you know the rest. I have to think about the people I’m trying to reach, my audience. My audience extends well-beyond the party “yolo” type, more into the ambitious family-oriented person looking to improve themselves and their environment.

Its crazy the type of things you think about when you’re forced to sit the game out, watching other people play non-stop. I must admit, I was scared for a while worried that an unexpected addition like our new baby may stop me from doing what I truly love all together. With some guidance and reassurance from those I love and respect, and of course some faith, I realized what’s for me is always going to be mine. I still had the passion, the drive, and the creativity to make my goals happen, so what was there to fear? Although a new baby meant some new challenges and more work, it doesn’t necessarily mean I couldn’t accomplish those same ambitions. I know plenty of women who have children (more than one) and can’t seem to cross over into legitimate entrepreneurship and success because of the challenges of motherhood. However, they do not define the role of Motherhood and Business Woman in my book, and I will do best to not look at them as examples of what to expect. I’m still scared, being that I never planned my sweet little bundle of joy and I have no idea how to incorporate him into the flow of things, but I pray and God got it for sure.

I don’t expect to be a perfect mother, I never even seen one of those. Nevertheless, I do want to be the best mom I can be. If that means that I have to put some selfish ambitions on the back burner (because I do love to have a good time and party all night), then it is no question… that’s what I’ll do. It should never be something of a sacrifice, when it comes to your babies. I want to set the greatest example for my sons, of what a REAL woman is capable of providing for her family, without neglecting their needs and image. It’s important to me that they know what kind of woman to eventually grow up and look for when they get older, despite what society and the corrupt media tries to portray.

I know now more now that some people read this website, not with the intention to be inspired or motivated, but to try to catch me slipping. They think they know me personally and they look to see what new things I’m into, what strides I’ve made if any, and what’s going on in my life. I assure you, it doesn’t bother me. I know that what I have is mine and mine alone and that no mere mortal can take that away. If watching me and quietly commenting amongst each other, is how they get through the day…. Continue to do so. It doesn’t do anything for me, if you didn’t know. I will say that I’m happy, whether I update this site every single day or once a month, I’m making moves. The satisfaction I get out of life is not measured by my peers, past or present. I’m in love, I’m healthy, and I’m blessed. My life is not measured by my status on Facebook or a tweet on Twitter, so stop checking my timeline for updates, because if you were worthyof some juicy gossip… you wouldn’t be twatching- you would know.

This baby is coming to a loving family, not too concerned with the world and its fickle ways. He is coming to two parents in love with each other and with life. That is all that matters to me. I’m planning to have a c-section, because I care about my vagina… just kidding (no not really). I plan to drop another video on Youtube soon, providing new updates and craziness with the Hubs, so be sure to check that out on my channel GaptoothDivaTV. So as I plan to have this c-section, whenever I go into labor (within the next 3 weeks), I know for sure I will really be out of it. Bear with me… I’m sure not giving up.

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Check out more new photos of my family and me on Facebook, under my personal page www.facebook.com/GaptoothDiva

For more follow me on Twitter, www.Twitter.com/GaptoothDiva or @GaptoothDiva

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My 4-Year-Old Therapist… Conversations with A’veri

Being the very perceptive person that I am, I usually try to find underlying meaning to everything that happens to me. It’s not that I’m searching really, but somehow signs and ideas just spark inside my mind from random places and events. Lately, I’ve been having some very insightful conversations with my four-year-old son, A’veri. Like his mother, A’veri lacks a “conversational filter”. This means that he will pretty much say anything, to anyone, anywhere, without hesitation. He also gets his friendliness from me, so despite my constant teachings about strangers, he still manages to try to make friends wherever we go. I love him to death, but I would never ever trust him with my darkest secrets, nor trust that I can get away with any crimes around him. He’s my friend, but the boy is liable to get me in trouble one day with his mouth, no lie.

A’veri has decided to give me unsolicited advice these past few months, and I can’t understand why. I haven’t been depressed or crying, nevertheless he comes to me with questions that he has already answered and proceeds to preach to me on a daily basis. Whether it’s about my self-esteem, my pregnancy, my relationship, my friendships, my fashion choices, or just some heavy things that have been on his mind, the boy can’t seem to shut up. I love him, I can’t stress that enough, but if school doesn’t start soon…. I’m going to go crazy. Although these discussions with my precious son are hilarious and often times bizarre, I can’t help but think he may be on to something.

Sometimes in life, God has a special message that you really need to receive. However, He sends it by a messenger that you would least expect. Most people would ignore that strange messenger, chalking it up as a weird conversation. People like me however, take heed and realize that it’s often just what I needed to hear, just from the lips of someone I never thought would say it.

Here is a list of random conversations we have had:

At the doctor’s office…

A’veri: “Mommy, Do you know why you have a baby in your stomach?”

Me: “Yes, I know why.  Do you?”

A’veri: “Yes, I know. You have a baby in your stomach because I’m tired of talking to myself.”

After dropping his father off at work…

A’veri: “Mommy, Are you mad at Daddy?”

Me: “No sweetheart, why are you asking me that?”

A’veri: “‘Cause I don’t want you to be mad at Daddy”

Me: “Well I have no reason to be mad at Daddy”

A’veri: “Good, ‘cause Daddy goes to work and buys us stuff. If you get mad at Daddy, he’s not going to go to work and buy us stuff anymore, and then I’m going to be really pissed off. Then you’re going to be mad at Daddy, I’m going to be mad at you and at Daddy, and Daddy is going to be mad at everybody. (*throws his arms in the air and shakes his head.*) That’s not right and God don’t like that.”

Me:  (*Laughing*) “Ok, lets try not to be mad at anybody then…”

A’veri: “No mommy, don’t TRY… just do it!”

A tired day, I decided to stay in the bed all morning. I was watching television, resting up.

A’veri: “Mommy, what’s wrong with you? You not happy?”

Me: “I’m fine. I’m just tired today.”

A’veri: “Don’t be sad. You’re beautiful. You’re a good mommy. You let me watch TV, you buy me toys, you give me bananas with chocolate sauce on it, and you got a baby in your stomach.

Me: “Ok…um…Thanks”.

A’veri: “So why you laying down?”

Me: “I said I was tired…”

A’veri: “Too tired to make me some bananas with chocolate sauce on it?”

Me: “A’veri, It’s too early in the morning for that and you just ate breakfast”.

A’veri: “Then why you let me say all those nice things to you?”

In the car…

Me: “A’veri, you are growing up so fast! (*Laughing*) Where is my little baby at? What happened to my precious little baby?

A’veri: “Mommy, who are you talking to?”

Me:  “You!”

A’veri: “Mommy, there ain’t no baby back here! You have a baby in your stomach… Don’t talk to me like that!”

Me: (*Laughing*) Ok, my bad.

At home…

Me:  “You hungry?”

A’veri: “Yes, I want a sandwich”

Me:  “Ok, I’ll make you a sandwich.”

A’veri: “Mommy, do I have to kiss your ass for you to make me a sandwich?”

Me: (*Laughing*) “No! Why would you say that?”

A’veri: *Heavy Sigh* “ ‘Cause, Daddy said you better have dinner ready when he comes home and you said ‘kiss my ass’.” *blank stare*

Me: “I’m sorry. (*Laughing*) I didn’t mean that for real. I was just joking.”

A’veri: “Ok, ‘cause that’s disgusting.”

A conversation with his father…

Dad: “I’m staying home with you and mommy today!”

A’veri: “Oh man, does that mean I have to go to work?”

Dad: “No, that doesn’t mean you have to go to work.”

A’veri: “Is mommy going to work?”

Dad: “No, we’re all staying home together”.

A’veri: “I don’t like it when you stay home. You turn the channel too much. *sighs*”

Dad: “Well, I’m staying home”.

A’veri comes into the bedroom to me…

A’veri: “Mommy, Daddy not going to work…”

Me: “So?”

A’veri: “Put him on punishment and tell him no TV”

Me:  “Why?”

A’veri: “‘Cause I’m supposed to watch TV, Daddy supposed to go to work, and you supposed to have babies!”

Me: “WTF!”

Obviously, I have a lot on my hands with this one. Now imagine these type of conversations times two…. I’ll wait.

God has planned something amazingly special for me with a child this unique. However, no matter what, I love this little boy.

Pray for Me. Xoxo

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GaptoothDiva Radio – Amazing Advice About Life and Relationships w/ Advice Guru Tamara Allen. Also Featuring Home Design Advice from James Swan Author of “101 Things I Hate About Your House”

Often asked for advice about love and relationships, family, raising children, dealing with life challenges and making tough decisions, Tamara has long since been the go-to person for family, friends, employees and coworkers. Never one to shy away from sharing her own experiences, Tamara uses her personal testimonies and experiences to impart wisdom and help others.

Tamara isn’t your average advice columnist; her words of wisdom come from a plethora of life experiences. From being a teenage mother, who took her child with her to Howard University; to being a single parent raising two children and going back to school to complete a graduate degree; and now as a married mother of four and an entrepreneur; Tamara give REAL advice from REAL experience.

Tamara does not claim to be a psychology expert, but she uses her education, experiences and natural discernment to look at a situation from all sides and offer quality advice. In addition to her advice column, Tamara is the editor-in-chief of Sisterz On The Move, an online magazine designed to inspire, encourage and empower women who are striving to balance their lives, make moves toward their goals, and live their dreams. She is also the creator and one of four hosts of Your Sisterfriends, a weekly online radio show focusing on the real-life issues of women and their families. Additionally, Tamara owns and operates her own consulting firm Kreativ Intervention that specializes in branding, marketing and public relations.

Also Featuring James Swan, Author of

“101 Things I Hate About Your House”

In 101 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOUR HOUSE: A Premier Designer Takes You on a  Room-by-Room Tour to Transform Your Home from Faux to Fabulous (Health Communications, Inc. March 2011), nationally renowned interior designer, James Swan shows readers how they can feel right at home in their house. After twenty years of working at the highest echelons of the design industry, Swan has seen it all and has observed virtually every mistake homeowners make. Throughout his career he’s learned this: We all make design mistakes and every house is a growing, evolving entity that asks  for attention, care, and consistent nourishment. Our living space provides a rich tapestry of opportunities, experiences, and memories in the making. 101 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOUR HOUSE teaches readers (and their houseguests) to truly enjoy the place they call home.  Swan provides readers with the basic principles they need to create a beautiful and gracious living space. Regardless of the state of their estate—be it massive or minuscule—or a person’s Style IQ, the principles of gracious living outlined in 101 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOUR HOUSE delivers a framework for a more beautiful and gracious home. This book is for all readers, regardless of whether their house is inspired by an English cottage, a French farmhouse, an Italian palazzo, or last month’s Design Within Reach catalogue — or if they have a lot of money to spend or very little. What does matter is that readers genuinely want to experience their home in a more beautiful way and that they are prepared to make easy, low-cost fixes to common mistakes. 101 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOUR HOUSE starts at the street, moves through the front door, and doesn’t stop until it has taken a peek into every room of  the house. Swan numbers the “101 Things” that make up this book so readers can easily reference items they find helpful, painful, or just too funny to forget, including the following:

#1. Dreary Little Mess: Nothing screams “dreary little mess” quite like
a front door masquerading as last winter’s snow tires. Clean it up. Wipe
it down. Patch it, paint it, stain it, wax it, but just get the door to
your home speaking a civilized language that is perfectly synchronized
with the impression you want to make.

#71. Age-Appropriate Design: Mom and Dad, it’s time to get over your
heels dragging on the subject of the kids growing up before your very
eyes. They will grow whether you want them to or not, so make the best of
a maturing problem and match their chronological age with the furnishings
in their rooms. A teenager (13 and older) should be sleeping in a double
bed, not in a childish twin. The progression from twin to double is a rite
of passage. Make it memorable for your young lady or gentleman.

#25. A Room without a Soul: If the gods of decorating are to be found
lurking in the details of your home, what do your details say? Take a
critical look at the small things that fill your table tops and shelves.
Do they tell a beautiful story, the story you want told? If not, then it’s
time to edit and rewrite your story.

#83. A Closet Case: Follow these three easy steps and win big in the
game of small closets. One: edit out things you’ve not touched in more
than nine months. Two: divide and win. Divide your wardrobe by season and,
three: high and low. Extra storage can be found high on shelves and
beneath beds.

#15. Soap Soup: Toss the gooey, goopy bar of soap and the dish too.
Upgrade your powder room with this simple A-list trick; nothing says
luxury like a beautiful bottle of spa-style hand soap and a small tray
displaying its matching wrapped bar soap. You’ve just elevated a mundane
moment and made it memorable.

#8. Smelling a rat: Beside the look of the house, a homeowner should
consider another layer of impression with which to astonish and astound
unwitting guests…take a deep breath and try not to choke on the aroma of
musty wet dogs, acrid cat boxes, marinating gym clothes, and damp, moldy
laundry. To put it succinctly: Buy a candle.

Swan also offers top ideas to make the living room ready for company — today; quick, practical projects to add pizzazz to anyone’s dining; valuable tips to make small spaces multifunctional, secrets to creating a bedroom sanctuary (tip: lose the TV!), and much more. Swan has partnered with veteran journalist Carol Beggy and award-winning set designer Stanley A. Meyer in 101 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOUR HOUSE to create a dazzlingly illustrated road map for navigating the subjective world of home design
and decoration.
Swan’s “take-no-prisoners” approach to home design offers fresh, upbeat and spot-on observations. Swan says, “Here it is, the ‘Cliffs Notes’ for a more beautiful home. Quibble if you must about your own personal style and artistic vision; or sit quietly by, knowing that you’ve single-handedly raised the bar for the stylishly impaired. It matters not.
There is room for all.” When the goal is to elevate our living experience from the ordinary to the exceptional, when we’ve taken steps to educate ourselves away from the faux pas and toward the fabulous, then we are well on our way to a more beautiful, gracious way of life. The plan that 101 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOUR HOUSE offers is simple: for readers to laugh, learn, and, most important, come to love their home as they’ve never loved it before. Now that’s beautiful.

101 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOUR HOUSE: A Premier Designer Takes You on a
Room-by-Room Tour to Transform Your Home from Faux to Fabulous
James Swan; Carol Beggy (contributor); Stanley A. Meyer (illustrator)
Health Communications, Inc.; March 2011
978-0757315671

Check him out at …
jim@james-swan.com http://www.linkedin.com/in/jamesswan
http://twitter.com/JamesSwan

CALL IN LIVE (646) 378-0442

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GaptoothDiva Radio – How to be Frisky from The Kitchen to The Bedroom This Valentine’s Day. Interview with Author Nancy Doeller of “The Frisky Cook” tonight at 9pm.

With recipes for deliciously fun dinner dates to promote passionate, playful relationships, this daring, decadent, and risqué guide cooks up a plate of lust with a side of sweet-nothings. GaptoothDiva talks with Author and Entrepreneur, Nancy Doeller of The Frisky Cook, about creative ways to make this year’s Valentine’s Day one your man will never forget, from his belly to his heart.

Teasing, lively, and mischievous, The Frisky Cook by new author Nancy Doeller offers women a years’ worth of daring dinner dates, steamy nights, and a smorgasbord of naughty niceties. With the goal to make all lovers and spouses vie for playmate of the year, Doeller helps others do what she does best. In three easy-to-follow acts and performance titles such as “Oh My July” and “Sassy September,” Doeller gets couple’s one-a-month party started. With her exceptionally enticing brand of joie de vivre, she complements recipes like “Fit-for-a-King Filet Mignon” and “Rough and Ready Mountain Man’s Dinner,” with cues on alluring, if adventurous, attire and directives on how to whisper dirty in his ear. By the main course, the author does more than show women how to keep the spark alive—she creates an inferno of food, fun, and lust.

With deliciously decadent details and a perfectly playful push to appeal to a man’s palate, Nancy Doeller’s saucy debut cookbook and racy relationship guide, The Frisky Cook, does something absolutely sassy. In one fail swoop, she gives couples reasons to be risqué—and the path to a rather lively enlightenment! If you feel like being just a little naughty—this is the book to point you in the right direction.

While it’s been said that the way to a man’s heart is through his belly, Doeller knows better. And by offering a calendar year of daring dinner dates, she stakes a claim on getting couples to really, truly enjoy a meal—and to savor their time together. In three parts with activity titles such as “Jumpstart January,” “Oh My July,” and “Sassy September,” there’s never a dull moment. She has games, goals, extra special nights out, pillow talk, and more. With appetizers like “Casa Nova Shrimp Cocktail” and “Nice and Naked Bruschetta,” Doeller has also created exceptional entrées such as “Fit-for-a-King Filet Mignon,” “Rough and Ready Mountain Man’s Dinner,” and a lobster dish that promises to be a nice “piece of tail,” not to mention desserts like “Bedroom eyes, Pecan Pie” and “Bad Boy Chocolate Cake.” A willing wife takes it to the kitchen where once a month she becomes the frisky cook who has her way so that her lover will be enticed, enchanted, and enjoying an unforgettable night of passion.

You have to give a little and take a little in this dynamite guide that shows the way to a man’s heart is only partly through his belly. In fact with the help of this cookbook, he’ll want to devour more than what’s on the menu—he’ll hunger for his frisky cook!

Included in this guide:

Directions on twelve three-course meals with daring recipes like “Rough and Ready Mountain Man’s Dinner” and “Bedroom eyes, Pecan Pie”

Inspired, unforgettable invitations that no man in his right mind will refuse

Hints on how to whisper “dirty”

Tips on the art of pillow talk

Pointers on daring get-ups

Coax him and make life steamy—this twelve-month dinner-date cookbook is certain to entice, excite, and tempt your man! Go ahead. Slip on something black and leather, serve a plate of pasta fagiole—the night is young.

Nancy Doeller studied health and physical education at West Chester University before marrying an Austrian chef she met while working as an activities director on a cruise ship. For nearly thirty years she helped her husband manage a yacht club, though also found time to study voice, acting, and dance. With an ear for writing jingles and a love for food, she began an entertainment and catering business in which she not only created menus and catered private parties, she delivered handmade gourmet baskets while singing original jingles and telegrams. Currently, she lives with her family in Wallingford, Pennsylvania, where she is working on her second cookbook as well as a television pilot. The Frisky Cook is her first book.

For more information Contact Nancy Doeller, Author of The Frisky Cook

Website: www.thefriskycook.com

Email : thefriskycook@gmail.com

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Happy 3rd Birthday A’veri Hornes – The GaptoothPrince Photo Slide Show

Everyone who knows me, knows how much I love my little GaptoothPrince A’veri. He is my heart,  my soul, my motivation, and my drive. I’m the woman I am today, because God put him in my life. Every mother should feel personally responsible for conducting herself in the manner in which she would want the female her son brought home to behave. I’m confident, I’m secure and I’m in love with this boy. His father will attest to the fact, that everything made more sense to me when he came into my life. I thank God for giving me the opportunity to raise such a bright, a beautiful, an intelligent, a creative and playful angel.

Nothing is more wonderful than this child, but the grace of God Itself. I love you A’veri and I’m blessed to have you in my life. Happy Birthday sweetheart.

Love your Mommy,

I’esha GaptoothDiva

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GaptoothDiva Radio – Who Doesn’t Need Childcare Advice? Speak to the Richmond Childcare Expert Cherrelle L. Hurt, CDA For Advice and Tips Tonight 10/14 @ 9pm

GaptoothDiva gets tips and advice about childcare and parenting from one of Richmond’s most profound childcare providers, Cherrelle L. Hurt. Ms. Hurt will discuss how she became the go-to person for new parents and individuals seeking a career in childcare and what are the best techniques & methods parents should use to ensure adequate childhood development in our infants, toddlers, teens, and young adults.

 Cherrelle L. Hurt, CDA (Child Development Associate) has been working in the field of helping profession for over 19 years. She is currently the owner of As We Grow Child Care & Learning Center /REIGN, LLC. Previously the Coordinator of the Earliest Beginnings Parenting Project for Children’s Health Involving Parents (CHIP) where she worked most of her young adult life. Ms. Hurt certifications and trainings include; MELD (Minnesota Early Learning Design) Site Coordinator, Born to Learn, Parents as Teachers- Parent Educator and recently a graduate of Hope in the Cities- Community Fellowship Program and the Black Caucus – Minority Political Leadership Program. In 2006, Endorsed by Councilman Marty Jewell, Ms. Hurt ran for her local school board and impressed by placing second in a 5 man race. As a committed community volunteer with service hours as Vice President of her Woodland Heights Civic Association, President – of Cities in Schools, Community Advisory Group and facilitator for Offenders Aid Restoration (OAR) where she taught Anger Management classes to inmates preparing for re-entry into the community. She is the proud mother of college student and honor roll elementary student.

As business owner of As We Grow Childcare & Learning Center/ REIGN (Reaching Each Individual in Guidance and Nurturing her mission is to provide affordable, safe and nurturing environment to all children. Currently she is building up the nonprofit that will provide free services to other business professionals and the community. The quote that best describes her passion for her work is “Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, “What are you doing for others?” – Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Check her out…

As We Grow Childcare & Learning Center

451 Belt Boulevard Suite E
Richmond, VA 23224
(804) 233-4116

Open Weekdays 6:30pm-10:30pm; Sat 8pm-11pm

Also, featuring Professional Flute Player Michael G. Hawkins. Michael G. Hawkins musical experiences include playing at numerous events such as community events, weddings, and receptions. He has participated with groups that opened for performers such as gospel recording superstar, Ms. Shirley Caesar. One memorable event that took place involved him playing in Coax, Switzerland. At that event, he had the opportunity to play in front of many individuals from different parts of the world.  Upcoming events include October 22, 2010 at Refresh Lounge at 7 p.m. (Artist Signing at Faith Landmarks Ministries).

Check him out… www.myspace.com/michaelghawkins

 Listen Live @ 9pm

www.blogtalkradio.com/gaptoothdivaradio

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(646) 378-0442

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As We Grow Childcare Gives 100 Bookbags to 100 Kids 08/22/2010

The fact that this center is open late isn’t the only reason you should enroll your child into As We Grow Childcare and Learning Center, you should also seek their educational services, as well as their parenting resources.
Owner and Childcare Specialist, Cherrelle Hurt conducted the first back to school supply drive at this new location, 451 E. Belt blvd. Richmond Virginia, with the help of Mr. Walker this Saturday from 2pm to 6pm. AWG was able to enlist the services of IPower 92.1′s own Sean Anthony the HipHop Motivator.
Children enjoyed treats from the cotton candy machine, Mr. Jay’s hot dog stand, and the Astrojump, while their parents were educated on services and resources from local vendors in support of the daycare. Parents were given a tour and donated school supplies from individuals in the community.
Overall it was a successful event and we look forward to the progression of AWG Childcare and Learning Center.

Open from 6am to 11pm Monday thru Friday.
452 E. Belt Blvd. Richmond Virginia 23224
(804) 233-4116
Currently Enrolling Now

WWW.Gaptoothdiva.com
follow me @ Gaptoothdiva on Twitter

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